22 May 2007

Martha Stewart Copped Out

I try to stick with themes. This morning, the theme that arrives time and time again, are wine glass tags.

Wine glass tags are just as they seem; little markers for the wine glass so that it doesn't get mixed up with another guest's wine glass. I thought to myself, "who puts their wine glass down?" But then it became obvious to me that when one ducks into a closet for a quick snog at a cocktail party, most people put their glasses down. It then occurred to me that you have just exchanged a lot more than spit--so why the shy behavior suddenly? BUT then I thought further and realized that it may come down to philosophy; HIS glass may be half empty.

First it started with a perusal of an old Martha Stewart Magazine. Someone requested "smart and simple" ways to make wine glass tags. The first mistake was to assume "simple" thought I. But Martha disappointed. She suggested buying silk flowers with the bendy stems to wrap around the glasses.

EWWW. Doesn't that seem a fright? I can imagine a rose growing up the side of your Burgundy and tickling your mustache.

Then I saw these, and suddenly the flower seemed downright avant garde!

I remember the good old days, when it was appropriate to drink out of "red cups" and you could just Sharpie your name on the side. Those were simpler times.

I'm not even gonna talk about these.

I've been wracking my brain to come up with a better idea. And then I had it. We've lived centuries without wine glass tags--therefore WE DO NOT NEED WINE GLASS TAGS.

As I always say, keep your wine glass close and the wine bottle closer.


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